[So I've finally convinced my other best buddy, Anonymous, to write a post! What's even more miraculous is that after months of commenting under no name, she's decided to pick a pseudonym: Derailed. And seriously? Nothing fits better. Here she writes about her relationship issues...]
Here's the deal: I’ve had this semi–sometimes–pseudo boyfriend for the past...ehhh 12 months now (one year?!) and we still haven’t spoken about it: the Big Commitment, the scary monster that hides under his bed. And we’re not taking marriage here either. We’re talking about the boyfriend/girlfriend commitment that should really be no biggie…right?
Wrong!
I know what you’re thinking. As a matter of fact I know what you’re doing. You’re parading around the room waving those big red flags and trust me I’ve heard it all before. I've heard every reason imaginable to break it off with my Commitment-Phobe and move on to bigger and better. "The grass is greener way over there on the other side of the fence and then a little to the left."
Sure.
The advice sounds rational…in theory. But the truth is that matters of the heart understand no logic. It goes in one ear and out the other. While it is not the most ideal, most perfect, or most fairy tale relationship, who really gets to decide what a relationship looks like anyway?
I just watched MTV’s True Life: I'm in a Love Triangle where one male and female couple mutually agreed on inviting a third party to their relationship! And they were both perfectly comfortable doing so. How’s that for conformity? Some might say that's insane, no?
So yes, it is true my pseudo-no commitment-sometimes relationship does have its ups and downs. It doesn’t involve family functions or public displays of the G word (for girlfriend). But there is good company, mutual respect as well as great intimacy - and come on, who can pass up cuddling in bed with ice cream?! And as odd as this sounds, it has stability.
So I would like to know: have you ever found yourself involved in a relationship that didn't necessarily fit the "norm?" And how many of you stuck by a Commitment-Phobe and how did it turn out?
Image: thinkbudget.com
Here's the deal: I’ve had this semi–sometimes–pseudo boyfriend for the past...ehhh 12 months now (one year?!) and we still haven’t spoken about it: the Big Commitment, the scary monster that hides under his bed. And we’re not taking marriage here either. We’re talking about the boyfriend/girlfriend commitment that should really be no biggie…right?Wrong!
I know what you’re thinking. As a matter of fact I know what you’re doing. You’re parading around the room waving those big red flags and trust me I’ve heard it all before. I've heard every reason imaginable to break it off with my Commitment-Phobe and move on to bigger and better. "The grass is greener way over there on the other side of the fence and then a little to the left."
Sure.
The advice sounds rational…in theory. But the truth is that matters of the heart understand no logic. It goes in one ear and out the other. While it is not the most ideal, most perfect, or most fairy tale relationship, who really gets to decide what a relationship looks like anyway?
I just watched MTV’s True Life: I'm in a Love Triangle where one male and female couple mutually agreed on inviting a third party to their relationship! And they were both perfectly comfortable doing so. How’s that for conformity? Some might say that's insane, no?
So yes, it is true my pseudo-no commitment-sometimes relationship does have its ups and downs. It doesn’t involve family functions or public displays of the G word (for girlfriend). But there is good company, mutual respect as well as great intimacy - and come on, who can pass up cuddling in bed with ice cream?! And as odd as this sounds, it has stability.
So I would like to know: have you ever found yourself involved in a relationship that didn't necessarily fit the "norm?" And how many of you stuck by a Commitment-Phobe and how did it turn out?
Image: thinkbudget.com